Book Review

Here's what happens to me when I don't have my nook.

I had to concoct a contraption to keep my paperback book open while I'm working out. It works best on the elliptical or biking because I can still put my finger on the page if I need to. Not so much while I'm running. I use my arms when I run. So I try to fashion a towel or water bottle across the pages to weigh them down so they don't fly up and make me lose my spot. I only get about 5 pages read on the treadmill. So here's the method to my madness. You'll notice my thumb in both pictures. I tried to document that the ink died (Or dyed? That's terrible--did I make it past the first grade?) all my fingers because I was sweating.

I miss my nook. Kate is borrowing it to read a couple books I have on there. Plus this Mitch Rapp series I'm reading by Vince Flynn is the bomb. I highly reccomend them. I only had 3 of them on the nook. Dad has the rest in paper back, so I didn't want to waste money by purchasing them again. Instead I borrow his. Library of Dad.

This is what I'm left with.

I'm not a complete diva though because at least I can recognize not buying something merely for convenience. It does not mean I can't enjoy my nook when I do have it, right?! 

The craziest thing is that I never used to read while I ran. The idea would have flabbergasted me. Just silly. But this series is just too good. Promise. Mitch is part spy-part BA-part hottie-part awesome-part Ironman winner-part everything. He's like a real life action figure. Besides I totally feel like I'm on the up and up with the inner workings of the CIA now. Go to your nearest amazon.com or Barnes and Noble or public library and start reading this series ASAP. You will not regret it.

Look!

I told Casey the other day after a Wal-Mart trip for groceries, "I think every time I go out, I end up buying something for the girls"...as I whipped another dog toy out of the bag. I wasn't even shopping for dog stuff. I went for groceries, and for whatever reason, found myself on the other side of the store on the dog aisle. It's a mystery to me too. My justification is that this toy is one they can play tug of war with...so they can play together! How cute. Well, I'm sure they'll play tug of war with plenty of the other toys too. But still. That was my reasoning.

Anyhow, this purchase that I'm about to show you was one-part-whim to three-parts-planned.

This (see below) is what we bought. This was also our first thought when we saw it, "That is so terrible. Who would put that on their wall?" Then the more I looked at it, the cuter I thought it was. What an adorable idea for a leash/harness holder! I want one! That's the spontaneous part. And of course, Casey was on board. The planning parts came into play when it took us (or maybe me...cause I want it all to be just right) a week to pick out which design we wanted and what color tooshies we wanted. We went simplistic, although a huge part of me wanted some funky, colorful design since it's by our back door and doesn't interfere with the rest of the house decor. Instead we went this route:

(tough to tell because the lighting was really poor at 10 pm, but the frame is cream,

the backdrop is black and cream diamonds, and the tails are obviously blue)

Let me just say, we are so pleased with our selection! How cute. The kicker? The scrabble letters at the top! "WOOF"...you want one now too, don't you?

And here it is on our wall.

And now with full paraphanelia (leash x2, harnesses, and pup name tags).

Please visit Aplomb Designs to buy one of your very own! 5 star ratings over here. She was so nice and efficient. We literally got ours in just two days. Two days, ladies and gents. Talk about customer service.

Two thumbs up for sure.

P.S. On the above mentioned trip to Wal-Mart is when I found out that they will not do puppy portraits. Who in their right mind would not want to photograph two of the most adorable puppies on this earth? I'm devastated. Does anyone know of a place who will do a puppy photo sesh?? For kinda cheap?

Scene: Kate, Casey, and I were looking at facebook.
Me: What! People get postcards made to mail out to announce that they are having a baby?? Casey, we're going to have a lot to live up to by the time we get around to that...I mean, people spend money on the dumbest stuff these days. 
Katie and Casey: (laughing)
Me: Oh, I guess I shouldn't say that considering I just finished talking about having the girls' pictures taken by a professional.

Stuffed Peppers

I personally have always thought "stuffed peppers" was a horrible name. It just does not sound good. Not even in the slightest. Well, this weekend we attempted to make stuffed peppers taste better than they sound. They were good, but we also have some suggestions and revisions for next go-round.

Ingredients:
3 green bell peppers
1 pound ground turkey, cooked
2 tablespoons olive oil
1/2 onion, chopped
1/2 cup mushrooms, chopped
1 zucchini, chopped
1/2 red bell pepper, chopped
1/2 yellow bell pepper, chopped
1 cup fresh spinach, chopped
     **basically, chop everything
handful of cherry tomatoes, halved or quartered (my fam is so into fresh tomatoes, so I added these for good measure)
1 (14.5 ounce) can diced tomatoes, drained (I'd recommend diced tomatoes with seasoning...italian or whatevs)
1 tablespoon tomato paste
Italian seasoning to taste
2-3 cloves roasted garlic, minced (or garlic powder to taste)
salt and pepper to taste

First off, this made A TON of filling. So, honestly, I'd suggest halving the meat (Freeze half for use at a later date! Hello, savings. Ground turkey is pricey.) and all the veggies unless there is one veggie you L-O-V-E and cannot get enough of. Then, by all means, use the full amount. Or you could buy more peppers to stuff.

Secondly, our suggestions for next time include adding some shredded parm to the mix and perhaps a bit of flavored rice (eg. rice-a-roni) for more flavor. Or you could play around with the herbs and spices some more.

Okay, here we go.

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

2. Wrap the bell peppers in aluminum foil and place in a baking dish. Bake 15 minutes in the preheated oven. Remove from heat.

3. Chop veggies.

4. In a skillet over medium heat, brown the turkey. Set aside.

Heat oil in the skillet, and cook onion, mushrooms, zucchini, red bell pepper, yellow bell pepper, spinach, and fresh tomatoes until tender.

Return the turkey to the skillet. Mix in the diced tomatoes and tomato paste, and season with Italian seasoning, garlic, salt and pepper.

5. Cut the tops off the green peppers and remove the seeds. (At this point, we would add said cheese and/or rice into the mixture.) Stuff the peppers with the skillet mixture. Garnish with a sprinkle of Parmesan cheese. (We also really like cheese in this family...everything in moderation. No? We try to use cheese in a dish whenever we can. Haha. Is that terrible?)

6. Return the peppers to the oven and continue cooking 15 mintues.

Super easy, right? And talk about some vegetables. Polyphenol and antioxidant city!

Oh and we paired our stuffed peppers with a warmly toasted cheese biscuit. YUM!

It's official!

Is it April yet?

We have an official pick-up date for our two little sweet peas. Friday, April 13. I CAN. NOT. WAIT.

Here's an updated picture.

Boone at 3 weeks old. And Brooks at 2 weeks old.

Can you even believe how much different the size is with just 1 week separating them?! Eek. I just want to hold them and cuddle them!

And the weather has been perfect for puppy walks. I promise you every day I walk outside and think, "this is perfect weather to walk Brooks and Boone." Sigh. Soon though.

I also love how whenever Casey and I talk about them, it's always "the girls." You'd think we were bringing home humans**. We are ecstatic for their arrival. Casey and I have a Wal-Mart/Petco/Petsmart date this weekend to complete the first aid kit. Other than that we are ready to rock and roll.


**More evidence that we totally talk about them like they are our children. Last night we had a nice dinner downstairs at our kitchen table with wine and even had the placemats out. AND we dressed up all fancy. Date-night-in. Our dinner was short, not like when you go out to eat and everything takes a little longer.
Me: Woah, that was a short dinner.
Casey: (totally serious) Well, we can just stay down here and talk. We do have the sitter for a while.
Me: (laughing) What's funny is you can say that for real in a couple weeks when Brooks and Boone are upstairs with Katie, and we're having dinner down here together.

This morning

On the mornings that I have to get up super early, I tote all my things into the bathroom and try to be church-mouse quiet when I'm getting ready. Then I always stumble through the dark to Casey's side of the bed and sit on the edge of the bed to nudge him into a semi-awake state to kiss him goodbye.

This morning, I got all ready and did just that. This is how our conversation went.

Casey: You look so pretty.
Me: (uncontrollable laughter) It's dark! You can't even see me!
Casey: Yes I can. I have night vision. (please note- his eyes are probably still closed, but I could absolutely be wrong) You're pretty.
Me: (still laughing) You're so funny. I love you.
Casey: I love you. More. Than you could ever love me.

He's so funny. I love that he can make me laugh even when I'm sleep-deprived and barely awake. I also love that he never fails to tell me I'm beautiful in his eyes.

Ear Wax

A post about ear wax is kinda gross, huh? 

Well, I can't help it. Cause these things are awesome. With a capital A. 

Kate and I discovered these years and years ago and do them every now and then. This particular brand is called Harmony Cone. Casey had never done this before. Who doesn't love trying new things? Katie and I coaxed him into participating. We probably told him he'd be able to hear things miles away afterwards. That's something we would do.

So this is what goes down. You put the stick in your ear (or have someone else do it for safety precaution) and light it on fire. Woot woot. Sounds dangerous, but that's partially why it's so fun. The risk that you could drop it and catch the house on fire. Or yourself. Take great care and hope that your helper is paying attention.

Then, when the fire burns halfway down the stick, the participant rolls over for the remainder of the stick to burn down to the red line in the other ear. Then you douse the burning stick in water to put out the fire, cut open the stick, and get grossed out by all the goo inside. We didn't take a picture of that part. Casey thinks it's a ploy. That the wax you see is part of the stick burning, and they make you think it's coming from your ears and now they are just super clean. Who knows.

Below is Casey's first time. It looks like he's having-fun-slash-scared. Either that, or he doesn't fully trust Katie to hold a fiery stick in his ear. He survived though.

You can find these ear wax candles (I'm not sure of their technical name) at most any natural foods or organic store. You know, the likes of Trader Joes, Earthfare, Whole Foods, Talleys, etc.

They're a little granola, but it's so fun to do and you feel as if you've done your body this great service of deep ear cleaning. Kinda like the feeling after getting a facial or pedicure...like your body should feel renewed and happy. No?

P.S. Casey has guard this weekend, so I'm working on his anniversary present on Sunday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He has no idea (until he reads this blog anyways)...

JK. THIS is the biggest news of my life.

We are getting TWO puppies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We just could not resist. Her name is Boone.

What a cutie huh? She's a week older than Brooks.

Now when Casey and I are working, they'll have each other to hang with.

That's her with her tummy up. Talk about content. Hahahahaha. LOVE!

They're going to have so much fun together.

BIGGEST NEWS OF MY LIFE!

I have BIG news. I'm talking the biggest news I've ever had.

We're going to be proud parents!!!

Of a puppy. But not just any puppy. An English Bulldog puppy.

I'd like to introduce you to Brooks. Blog readers, Brooks. Brooks, your audience.

Just kidding. Kate got this little stuffed pup for Brooks to play with. So we had to try her harness and leash on someone. Looks good, huh?


Here's Brooks for real though!

How sweet is our little angel? She's only 1 day old in this pic, and I think she's adorable. But she'll get wayyyyyy cuter.

Her name comes from the name of the only running shoe I have faithfully trusted for 10 years. So it just makes sense. When we thought of it, I knew it was just perfect!

Brooks is my anniversary gift from Casey. I know, I know. Our anniversary is not until May, but you can't just pick when you want your little girl to be born. Am I right or am I right? So we get our little angel early. Lucky me! Lucky us!

Casey: When we get Brooks, if I get home from work first, are you gonna come in the house and go hug and kiss Brooks first?
Me: (diverting my eyes)...Well, no?
Katie: Yes, she is.

She was born just 5 days ago. I think she's just beautiful. We went to go see her this morning. It was the best ever. I cannot even portray my excitement over here. You have absolutely no idea.

Dad: Your Valentines baby.
Me: (squeal) I KNOW!


We have everything for our newest addition, with the exception of me needing to finish putting together her first aid kit. Yes, I'm serious beyond serious.

Kate: Are you going to have a bag for her first aid stuff? Or a box?
Me: Oh, I have a bag for everything already. 
Kate: Are you going to make Casey carry the bag with him anytime he takes her somewhere?
Me: Yes. Everywhere Brooks goes the first aid kit goes.

I'm so worried about my little girl's safety, and we haven't even brought her home yet. Will it be worse when we have a human child? That sounds so creepy. At least we have an excellent vet picked out. It's less than 2 miles from the house. Is it weird that when I called all the vets to ask questions, I was secretly rating them on their friendliness to see if they would treat Brooks as she should be treated? First impressions are everything.

Me: OH!!! Did Brooks get her license in the mail??
Casey: Her license? Is she driving now?...but yes, her ID came.

Here's her cute little tag (obviously you can't read it, but hopefully if someone finds her they'll have a magnifying glass with them...but then again we'll never let her cross the street by herself):

We get to bring her home in April, so now we just have to finish puppy-proofing the house. You know, like get rid of the grapes and chocolate...

Me: Are you excited to be a grandma again?!
Mom: Yes! Are you going to be able to sleep until Saturday? (in anticipation of seeing her for the first time)
Me: NO! I'm not going to be able to sleep until April.
Mom: You're going to be really sleepy.

Katie is such a great aunt already. For all of Dawn's kids, when they were born, she bought them each blankets with their names embroidered. So she totally surprised me with a blanket for Brooks. Her very own blanket to burrow into!!! With her name embroidered in purple. It is so soft and sophisticated...just like Brooks. I think Kate is pretty stoked about her newest niece. But who wouldn't be?

Here's a glimpse of her precious little blanket:

Ya'll never saw her bowls when they arrived from wag.com either, did you? They're adorable. Simple, but adorable:

We also bought this Friday at Costco:

I told Casey way back when that whenever we get a puppy we will have to buy a video camera. So here we  are. With a video camera. It's waterproof and shockproof. You never know what we'll get into.

She's going to be so spoiled. So spoiled that we all now call the guest room Brooks' room.

Ya'll might think I'm crazy with all this stuff, but I'm not. I love animals. I love puppies. And I especially love bulldogs, so this is so fantastic to me that we're going to have our very own!

Casey is the best husband in THE. WHOLE. WIDE. WORLD. He's so selfless, so kind, so generous, so perfect.

Shopping

I'm not a big fan of shopping. I'm not a big fan of spending money. Except for certain things. Sometimes I like to buy clothes or what not. But I really like shopping (browsing) for our NEW PUPPY!

Here are a couple things that Kate and I almost (strongly considered) bought for her while Casey was in Alabama. None of these are over the top, right?

1. Parka (cause it's gets so cold in Charlotte...no?)

Or a camo to go hunting with dad?

Or to go skiing in the Alps?

2. Halloween-slash-Easter costume (double use totally makes it worth it)

3. Raincoat (bulldogs do not like getting rained on)

4. Boots (for the mountains)

5. Lifejacket (for fishing and boating with dad)

If you go to www.wag.com and click on "Dog", there's a category called clothes and accessories. Haha. I love it. Sigh. Puppies are the best.

Death by coffee

I absolutely just choked on my coffee. My life just flashed before my eyes. And if you think I'm being dramatic, think again.

There's now coffee all over my pants. Classy, right? While I tried to spit it back into the cup to avoid choking, I discovered travel mugs are not ideal for that because the little spout opening is so small. So on my pants it is. Oh well. At least I'm alive! Death by coffee? Not cool. Maybe it's my body's way of reinforcing the fact that I've been drinking wayyy too much coffee lately and need to slow it down.

Anyhow, in the spirit of nearly losing my life, I want to share a little conversation between my honey and I from this morning...arguing about who loves the other person more. Typical of us.

Me: Yeah. Totes, baby. Hey did you know that I love you more than the number of fish in the sea?
Casey: That's alot, but did you know I love you more than there are stars in the universe?
Me: Well, there has to be more fish than stars. Has to be.

Dear God

Okay, Lord, I get it. I think.

Money doesn't matter. You provide us with plenty. You show me this each and every month. Yet I still push away the nagging feeling that we should give you more. We can be stretched thin, and it's okay. We'll be okay. You'll make sure of that. Why do I even doubt that?

We have enough. Enough to fill up our cars to get to and from work. Enough to buy groceries. Enough to pay the mortgage. Enough to keep the lights on and the water running. Enough to pay the medical bills. Even enough to buy for other people, for our (future) puppy, enough to do fun things, and even enough to buy some new white skinny jeans (that were on sale and free shipping) from AE. And absolutely enough to give extra to give to you. I think know you're trying to tell me and Casey that we can give more to you. More than we have been. It is your money, after all. You just let us take care of it for you. Although, sometimes I'm not sure why. Money makes me nervous. As much as the planner in me desperately wants to put extra money into savings (because you call us to be responsible with what you have given), maybe you're telling me, "Trust me. Give back to my church. To supporting the spread of my word. To supporting those who teach and give and need. Just trust me."

You're just so funny. We got this crazy, unexpected check from our mortgage company last week (Something about escrow surplus...I don't understand all that. Dad said we were good to go, and he's the financial whiz). Aren't we supposed to be paying them? And I was so stoked. God is blessing us! And I deposited the money into my account yesterday ready to just drive myself right home and transfer it to our savings account. Pup can get her shots! Our child can go to one day of college with this money! One of us can go on a cruise! Then, I got home to a piece of mail. Not a fun piece of mail either. CMC decided to send a bill for nearly $900 from my fall last July when I had to go to the ER. The same amount as the check we just received from the mortgage company. What? Why, God? Why $360 just for someone to take some rocks out of my knee and clean under a flap of skin. I could've done that.

At least it was not a bill to be paid with money we don't have. Pam, be thankful you just got that $900 check, not upset because it's out the window again. Even though we had no plans for that money besides savings, I was dejected. Today I called the hospital to question the bill because there appeared to be no deductions due to insurance coverage or anything. She said she would re-process the request to the insurance company, and they would send me a new bill if we still owe anything after. Sigh of relief. $900 is back! Maybe...

So, Lord, I do think I'm starting to truly get it. I'm going to talk to Casey, and see if we can't use our money more wisely for you. You already provide us with so much.

And my fears are just plain silly. We don't even have medical bills piling up that we can't afford to pay  like some people do. We both have jobs. We have a lovely house where the mortgage gets paid on time every month. Who am I to be selfishly unthankful? We can give more to you AND still afford to go to a movie or to dinner and to buy some new skinny jeans and save little bits for our puppy along the way.

Mondays: Stereotyped

Two things happened to me today that just scream MONDAY:

1) I ran this morning at work (treadmills in the lab for those of you who have no clue what I do) and then had to shower here...naturally. I showered and was getting dressed only to find out (after frantically tossing my clothes about) that I had forgotten a clean pair of undies. Seriously? What are my options? Go commando...in jeans? My worst nightmare. Or wear dirty underwear? My other worst nightmare.

Sigh. I'm sure I have worse nightmares than those. But that's just all I could think this morning. What's a girl to do? What would you do? I'm commando right now. Not that any of you care or need to know. But in the essence of being truly honest with you, I thought you should know that I am a clean person and could not imagine wearing dirty undies.

I know you've all been there, admittedly or not. Maybe you just don't talk about it as candidly.

2) I just ate my banana. I thought I had successfully examined and removed all the strings, and was putting the banana in my mouth only to feel one of those strings dangling at my chin. Disgusted, I immediately removed the banana from my mouth and disposed of the string. Gross out. I nearly ate a banana string. Ugh. This weekend my nephews were eating bananas, they have no qualms with a banana strings. I literally could not watch them eat. Is that really so strange? Who here likes string-less bananas and who could care less?

Oh another note, I was playing legos with Keller (one of my nephews) this weekend, and we were building and sorting. He had bought a new bag of legos from the Lego Store at Concord Mills (with his very own money...so cute). In the bag, there were 3 cool looking Atlantis characters. Now I'm not familiar with who they are, but I knew they were important because he kept talking about them. He has the sweetest heart. He insisted that I take one of them home with me to play with. His brand spankin new lego. AND, even cooler, it's a magnet too! My heart just melted. I told him I would borrow it until the next time I saw him and then he could have it back, so we could both play with it.

So here it is. Right at home on our fridge!

Veg Faj

Before you hate on me for the title of the post. That's what Kate and I had for dinner Thursday night. I finally felt up to eating after my experiences this week (that you can read about {HERE}).

We made Vegetable Fajitas. She abbreviated it Veg Faj which actually sounds quite disgusting if you say it out loud. Try it then you'll get me. So we couldn't stop calling it that all day and night yesterday. So that's the new official name. Welcome to our world!

So I had a ton of veggies stocked up and fruit and beans and nuts because before I went to the doctor, noted in the blog referenced above, I thought I needed to go on a natural foods and raw foods diet to cleanse me while still giving me sufficient nutrients, vitamins, and minerals. You know, no processed foods or artificial sweetener or coffee or dairy. Seems silly now that I know what's wrong. But I love fruits and veggies no matter, so I'll eat them right up. So I decided to get creative and make Veg Faj. I know have been slacking on the cool-recipe-posts, but I haven't been all out cooking a whole lot with Casey being gone. I'll just do simple stuff for myself like soup or salad or lean cuisine or a sandwich. And that's not exciting.

This recipe is super easy and super healthy. Now that I don't need a natural foods diet, I added cheese and these cool Flat Out wraps that we had tucked away in the fridge. We substituted these for tortillas. Here they are. You can view the different kinds at the Flat Out Bread Website.

So, I had a red pepper, green pepper, and white/yellow onion (who really knows the difference between a white or yellow onion anyhow?) all sliced up.

Throw a saute pan on the stove with 1 Tablespoon of EVOO and cook the veggies until translucent or slightly browned (up to your standards and preference) on medium heat.

In the meantime, preheat the oven to 350.

Once the veggies were cooked, we added about 2/3 can of black beans drained (you can do however many black beans you want, but we figured we'd save some for salads). Also, add McCormick Fajita seasoning (we used just half the packet of seasoning) and about 1/4 cup of white wine. The seasoning packet says to add water, but we do white wine. When is there not an occasion to use wine in cooking? It's way more fun. And you don't have to use the seasoning packet, you can throw in your own spices, but Thursday, we were just going for simplicity.

Stir and let cook for 3-5 minutes. If you need to reduce the liquid, cover the pan.

Meanwhile, half about 12-15 cherry tomatoes (who doesn't LOVE fresh tomatoes?). From your fridge, pull out some shredded mexican cheese, FF sour cream, and salsa. (Remember I don't have to stick to the natural foods thing, so the cheese and sour cream and flat out are okay to eat now!)

I prefer homemade salsa, but I just did not have time nor feel up to it. Please see the recipe for homemade salsa at the bottom of this post though.

Prepare your flat bread with you desired fixins' and pile on however many vegetables you want. They're super healthy so it's okay to mound them up high. It's like a veggie bonanza.

Wrap up your tortilla, so it looks like a burrito. We kind of ended up with a fajitto (fajita-burrito).

Place on a baking sheet (we used the toaster oven pan cause it's just the right size). And put in preheated oven to completely warm through and melt cheese.

Top with a touch of sour cream and salsa and enjoy the Veggie Fajitto.

Disclaimer: It's not as huge as it looks. I use salad plates for dinner in our house. I don't know why. That's not a full-size dinner plate. Do not be alarmed or overwhelmed.


Homemade Salsa!! 
This stuff is like a party in your mouth. Especially with the fresh cilantro.

4 vine ripe tomatoes
1 red onion
1 lime
1 cn white corn
1 can black beans
1 small wishbone italian dressing
cilantro
1-2 cloves garlic, minced
2 serano, jalapeno, or habanero peppers (small)

Dice tomatoes, onion,  and peppers. Pour dressing over mixture. Rinse beans and corn and add to mixture. Add garlic and stir. Put lime in microwave for 10 seconds to realease all oils and juice. Roll lime on counter, then cut in half. Squeeze lime halves over mixture. Add chopped cilantro, as much or as little as you wish. Chill at least 3 hours.

*You can vary this as you like. Take out corn and add diced, ripe peaches, as an example.

My Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday

So, in a nutshell, I was having crazy shooting, sharp pain in my lower abdomen on Saturday. I thought it was just a tummy ache, and I can live through that, right? Well, it went away (mostly) on Sunday, so I thought nothing of it, until it came back in full force on Monday. That's when I officially decided: natural foods diet all the way. At least for a couple weeks. I had to cleanse my system of all things processed and artificial and potentially harmful to my system. What better way than to stuff myself with fruits, veggies, and legumes? So I went out Monday night to Lowe's Foods to stock up. Then Tuesday, the pain spread. It was no longer intermittent, sharp pain, but it was all across my abdomen below my belly button and spread slightly to the left and all the way to the right side up to the bottom of my ribs. It was especially bad when I pushed on my stomach. 

This was no ordinary stomachache. I felt nauseous, but I just kept to myself at work even though I wanted to leave. Then I went to do my run after work and just had this terrible pain while I was running, I kept on though. What's a little pain, right? I must have eaten something old and terrible to make me feel this bad. What the eff? (Please note, I don't actually say the F-word. I do say eff sometimes. I don't around small children or people I don't know. I don't want to give them the wrong idea about me. I'm a nice girl. And I don't curse.) 

So I felt better when I got home and just curled up in the couch. I was not hungry at all though. But I stuffed some food in my mouth because I knew I should. When I went to bed (at 8:30 no less) I felt worse. All the pain was lower abdomen and and on the RIGHT. Warning lights. Loss of appetite, nausea, lower right quadrant pain. Kate told me I HAD to go to the doctor on Wednesday. No question. I mean it was pain I could live with (not comfortably mind you), but I knew something wasn't right.

So Wednesday morning I woke up and still in pain, could not eat, and just felt like I had no energy. I'm talking energy drained enough that I skipped yoga on Tuesday night. Boooo. So I went to work and called and the doctor's office scheduled me right away.

So I'm waiting around at the doctor and getting a little dizzy, and I can't even remember Casey's phone number to write on the form. What! Then I was sent back to my little room and waited around some more. When the doctor finally saw me, guess what? Pain shifted left. He was stumped. I still had some pain on the right and all the pain below my belly button, but now it was left. Again, what the eff? I legit thought I had a tumor. 

He says, immediate CT scan with contrast dye. He says to the imaging center, "call my cell phone with the results." Cell phone? Not even the office? What is wrong with me? Then he said he'd call me right away. I do not want surgery...the money, the no running, the recovery, the I-have-to-be-at-work, the I-don't-want-Casey-to-feel-like-he-has-to-come-home, the it'll-ruin-my-anniversary-present-for-him. No no no. Not an option. More than that, I was deep down scared that it was a mass in my abdomen. Do I have to live with this constant pain for months? What else will I need to get better? Will I get better?

I'm a "what-if" person to the max. I think of all possibilities and run with the ideas. It was a struggle to calm down in my mind and not think of all the worst scenarios.

So I mosey (or drive) over to Carolinas Imaging Center just down the road. They are THE nicest people in the world. Nicest people ever at a medical facility. No joke. You can visit them here: Charlotte Radiology For any of your imaging needs, please go. The one in Matthews is great.

The nice ladies tell me I have to drink two LARGE containers of nastiness. The one lady (who ends up doing my scan) recommends a little variety. Take 1 vanilla and 1 mocha. I think, "I can totally do this, I haven't had coffee in a few days. Mocha sounds nice. I'm a champ. I can suck those down." Let me tell you a little something about Barium Sulfate. It does not taste good. Not even a little bit. And it certainly did NOT taste like coffee. Here they are.

Tall, cold containers of delciousness. Not. By this time mom had arrived (she's the sweetest--she left work early to come hang out with me). We chatted for a few, and I was FREEZING. This stuff was making me feel sick. Then daddy showed up too! What a nice surprise. They are the best. I had convinced myself I was fine by myself cause I was just sitting there, afterall. But it was nice to have them there with Casey being out of town. It passed the time and was comforting especially not knowing what was wrong.

So I waited an hour and half (had to drink the nastiness over an hour's length). I was not allowed to shotgun it. Then I went back, and they put in an IV to shoot the dye through my veins so I would light up real bright when I was scanned. I tell you what, that dye was crazy. I felt like I was on fire from the top of my head to my face to my hoo-hah. I legit thought I had wet the CT scan bed. I mean I had dranken (is that correct grammar?) alot of liquids. And a strange metallic, blood-like taste was in my mouth. So strange. But then that was it. Quick as a bunny. Done.

Now they said this sulfate stuff would make me go to the bathroom and not to be surprised if I went alot on Wednesday night. Well, kids, I did not go. At all. Or yesterday. What is wrong with me? Shouldn't I be going if they said to expect it? So now I'm just waiting. TMI? I don't care. Goes with the territory of 5 hours at the doctor.

The doctor called very quickly with my results, which in my mind is either good or bad. The verdict: not appendicitis or a tumor. I had a hemorrhagic ovarian cyst. That burst. Inside me. I had a pool of blood floating around inside inside me which explained the moving pain. The blood will resorb into my body and the pain will go away within two weeks. Take Ibuprofen. Can a girl not get something more powerful than that? 

So I went home and to the gym. I was in alot of pain when I was working out. I could barely finish the workout which was more frustrating to me. I just cried all the way home. When I got out of my car, I just willed a new letter from Casey to be in the mailbox. To my surprise, there were 4! In that moment, I was so excited for backlogged mail. But just wished he could be inside when I walked in the door. To hug me and make me feel better. I think I cried so much because of all the unknowns and the relief all jumbled together. And him being gone and knowing the pain would stick around for 2 more weeks.

So yesterday, I stayed home from work to get back to normal and just relaxed, had a better workout, went to Barnes and Noble with my fam to hang out, and then went to get my nails done with Kate. Then we went home for a movie and dinner and bed. Low key day.

I was trying to take a picture and the best place to see the blue was against my white shirt, but it looks so awkward cause I'm trying to get my hand and hold the camera with the other and not take a full boob shot. Sheesh. Don't judge me. As long as you can actually see the PRETTY color, we're good. Kate helped me pick it out. I'm thrilled with it. It makes typing at work way more fun.

I feel like a million bucks today compared to the rest of the week! PTL!!

(Ibuprofen was plenty. And I haven't even taken any today! Sometimes doctors know what they're doing.)

I feel like such a wimp. Because so many people have so many bigger problems than this. But it was a scare. That I might be one of them. That no matter what the result was, it was God's plan. There was a purpose. And when something like that happens, it's kind of hard to completely trust and be okay with the outcome knowing the Lord is in control. He was truly watching over me. And maybe he knew better than I that I needed a day off work! Also, comes back to the blog about money, that it's something each month. Now we have a CT scan deductible to pay. He's funny. God is.

Letters to Casey (Week 2)

BABE! I prayed for you today. I've been praying for you everyday.

I miss you like WOAH. Isn't it funny? I feel like it's last year all over again. When you lived in Boone and I lived in Charlotte without you. Every night I would just long for you to be there so I could hug you and kiss you. I forgot what that truly felt like until now.

I realized earlier this week that I'm counting the weeks you are gone by the number of times I bring the trash can and recycling bucket back into the garage. That's only two times so far. Sigh.

It's really no fun to go to yoga by myself. Or to brush my teeth by myself before bed. Or to not have anyone to kiss goodbye in the mornings. Or doing handstands without you. Or eating cereal without you on the weekends. Or having the most handsome man in the world sneak up behind me on the treadmill at the gym. Or occasional trips to Sweet Frog and the grocery store without you. I miss the simple most ordinary things.

I also miss the unique and special things you do and say that make me feel like a zillion bucks. You make me happy. Did you know that? Yeah. YOU can do that. Turn my frown upside down. Make me giggle when I'm down in the dumps.

You're missing out on the Challenge, The Bachelor, Teen Mom. All the good shows. JK. But you're a doll to watch all those silly shows with me. What you're legit missing out on is Revenge. It is so good! And Bethenny starts soon. She's so so funny. Like me. (And actually, to let you in on a secret, the Challenge actually is really good so far.)

I bought our puppy (I almost said her name, but that's supposed to be a surprise for the viewing audience. I cannot believe I almost slipped!) her water and food bowls last night. And her leash. On wag.com. How cute is the name of the website? You'll approve of the selections. Cause I've got style. Trust me. 

I also wanted to remind you to do your best in all you do. That's all that matters. YOUR best. Not someone else's. And it glorifies the Lord. Isn't that we're in this world for anyways?

Also, I wanted to remind you what Timmy (Tebow) (as if I really had to clarify...) always said to himself for motivation when he needed an extra push in his training:

"Somewhere he is out there, training while I am not. One day, when we meet, he will win."

(I picked orange for the Broncos! And for Florida! Convenient, huh?)

Now, you use that as motivation to do your best.  And to keep training hard, not just enough to get by. To beat them all on that 1.5 mile run, on those push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups. And in the classroom. To stand out.

But even if you don't beat any of them, I love you and am proud of you for being there and working hard and giving your best.

I love you wrapped around the world infinity times plus 22.

P.S. Look! I found another heart. This time it was in my eye shadow. You know the first coat I put on. You know I don't have ghostly eyes with this pearlescent color. But another heart. Just for us. I find them everywhere and in the strangest places, huh?

You know you're spoiled by your Nook when...

I was at the gym today. I was doing some cross training on the elliptical, so took advantage of reading the latest Runner's World we got in the mail. I cannot read mags on the treadmill, only my Nook, which I never thought I'd ever be able to do either. But it's surprisingly easy and passes the time like crazy...and I can make the text bigger on the Nook, so the bouncing up and down doesn't inhibit my ability to read. Besides, if you're running effortlessly and smoothly, you shouldn't be bouncing much anyways, right?

Okay, totally beside the point, so back to the elliptical story. I was reading my Runner's World, and instead of physically turning the page, I tapped the bottom right of the left page there (see picture below). It did not go to the next page. 

 

 Then I came back to reality. OH MY GOODNESS. This is a magazine. Paper. I have to turn the pages myself. Did I seriously just do that?? That's when I realized I've been reading too many books and am spoiled by my Nook (it's a touch screen...you know iPod or iPad style). I was a little embarrassed, but laughing at myself inside.

Truthfully, I don't think you can ever read too many books.

Then I noticed the quote at the bottom of the page when I went I back to take a picture for you guys:

"I think I get addicted to the feelings associated with the end of a long run. I love feeling empty, clean, worn out, starving, and sweat-purged. I love the good ache of muscles that have done me proud."

I love that quote. It pretty much sums up running for me, except she forgot to talk about the adrenaline and the high too. I just love running. And being capable of running and being passionate about it.

Unfortunately, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still apparently spoiled by my Nook.